Before writing more substantive topics, I thought I would start with how I personally found the Infinite Banking Concept. I feel like it took me longer than most people to come around to IBC. But with that I had many questions and concerns that I feel would be relevant to those being exposed to IBC for the first time. I hope reading my experience will help you in your exploration of this concept.

My family and I were doing well financially, despite buying our first home in 2007 and having to short-sell it in 2011 due to a Permanent Change of Station (PCS). We were a single income house with my wife taking care of the children and homeschooling as they grew. We were generally following all the conventional wisdom from Crown Financial Ministries and Dave Ramsey and the like. Shortly after 2011 we were completely debt free, having paid off all school loans and having two paid off cars – and, because of the financial impact of the short-sale, we took military housing at our new assignment. With the debt gone, I increased contributions to retirement accounts, and also began to put away more towards our children’s futures.

In the summer of 2023, I started hearing ads for a non-Nelson Nash Institute agency advertising what they called private banking. Like most I did not know anything of what they spoke – I knew all the conventional wisdom checking, savings, IRAs, 401(k)s, stock, bonds, and mutual funds, dollar cost averaging, “sure the market just tanked (again), but you’ve got time to recover”. All of those options where you get a paycheck and immediately give up control of the money for someone else to make money on. But being your own banker? I was interested in learning more, so I set up a call with this agent.

The agent, we’ll call him John, was friendly and enthusiastic. About half of it was just getting to know us and where we were in life and financially. During the conversation I gave him rough numbers because I was not comfortable giving specifics to a stranger. After the call, my wife and I had no clarity and my wife asked me if the agent saw us as dollar signs. I did not, and still do not, think we were just a commission to this agent. I think our experience was due to him being a relatively new agent, as we later found out.

John sent me their self-published mini book designed for marketing. Two actually – both branded for the agency – one authored by John and one authored by another agent. To their credit, both books did mention Nelson Nash in the introductions and acknowledgements. Even after reading these, I still did not feel that I knew what IBC was or how it worked. Maybe I’m slow, maybe in enthusiasm I read the books too quickly to retain the information. On a second call I got shown various excel calculators claiming that if I put my savings into a policy and paid off my mortgage how much better off I’d be. However, comparing the low interest rate of my mortgage at the time to the higher policy loan rate, it didn’t make sense to me. At this point I was also given an illustration.

The illustration was apparently what I had asked for – although I don’t recall asking for anything specific. I was seeking education and explanation, not illustrations. I had given rough numbers of our emergency savings account, and separate auto savings, vacation savings, and accounts for each of the kids. I’d expressed concern for moving the money to savings quickly (out of enthusiasm more than knowledge of policies) as well as concern for having enough liquidity by the time I retired from active duty 3 years later if I needed access to it.

John’s illustration was about as “skinny base” as possible (more on policy design in another article). Something like 3% base. This ensured I had my savings accounts moved into the policy in year one. And the lower base meant in years 2+ meant I’d be able to afford the minimum premium. It seemed to make sense. And, at least according to the illustration, the policy would not become a Modified Endowment Contract (MEC) in the future. But I wasn’t comfortable with it. Signing a check that big is not easy.

I like to think myself fairly proficient in Microsoft Excel. I began trying to do all sorts of calculations in Excel Calculations you can’t do without the insurance company’s actuarial software as well as estimations comparing scenarios trying to determine the right policy design. But I didn’t know that. Every question I brought up to John resulted in receiving another illustration (many of which were tabular detail only, which is not permitted by the insurance companies). I also wasn’t sure if I should have one larger policy or one on me, and then one on each child (moving their savings accounts into policies). Through this John and his team, especially “Stacy” (name changed), were very patient with me, I thank them for that. They could have just said “sorry, we can’t work together.”

Each time the illustrations were the same product with different inputs. However, eventually, I was shown a different product with the same company. Wait, you mean to tell me each insurance company offers different products? Well now I had to figure out why I would want one company over another and why I would want one product over another. The plot thickened. I needed to know more.

During this time John had sent me Nelson Nash’s book, Becoming Your Own Banker, and I read that about as fast as I could. From this reading, it “clicked” – I was in. But questions of company, product, and design still lingered and sent me down a rabbit hole of YouTube and Brave searches. I also wanted to know the differences between companies. I wanted to know the ins-and-outs of the lifetime contract I was about to start writing substantial checks for. What is direct vs non-direct recognition? How is this PUA rider different from that one?

Through it all, I found various websites and videos talking about the “big 4” companies, policy design, some agents touting how they gave up commissions for the client benefit in the design they recommend, and other such noise. I met with agents with these other groups. I saw illustrations of at least 9 products from at least 4 companies. One YouTube channel even made a video directly to my situation – down to the dollar amount and addressing my timeline concerns. I even ended up meeting with IUL agents with a big agency, as soon as he said “what is stopping you from buying a policy right now,” and other lines he learned from a weekend sales seminar, the conversation was done.

From my excel files, I was trying to compare them all to each other to see which company and product was best for me. I was not afraid to pay a premium and I was trying to think long range, but I also needed to balance that with my pending retirement from active duty. I asked the various agents I’d talked to about policy design. “Should feathering in savings in 3 years be better, or 4, or 7?” The most I ever got back was “yes, we can build that for you, here’s an illustration”. I couldn’t believe that I, a layman and novice, had somehow stumbled upon the “proper design” for my situation. No one knew my situation better than me…but I barely knew how Whole Life Insurance worked!

John may regret it, but a resource he pointed me to during this was an episode of a podcast called Banking With Life, by James Neathery – the man who would later become my mentor through the Nelson Nash Institute.

I reached out to James’ office, not realizing he was an agent. I was just seeking someone more experienced to help me identify the right policy design. The agents I’d previously talked to weren’t doing that. Angelic intentions – they wanted to give me what I asked for – whereas I didn’t want to have buyer’s remorse – especially when I’m looking at moving life savings. James and his son Jake explained the differences in products, uncovered the differences in the companies and their riders, and rather than proposing a policy design they proposed a strategy that would set up our family for long term success. Not just a single Whole Life policy, but a SYSTEM. IBC isn’t about a product or product design. It’s a process and it’s about using the policy as your banking system to finance your life.

So I purchased my first policy and started my banking system with James Neathery. I feel I parted with John on good terms. I provided feedback on why I went with James Neathery instead, in hopes that he could learn from it. I hope his practice is thriving and I hope his clients are doing well.

Wrapping up, I’m sure I’ve persuaded you to give James Neathery’s team a call right now. And I would not fault anyone for doing that. Giving him credit is a necessary part of paying my dues. For anyone who found this valuable, I will give you the same attention and care and service as I received. I want to focus on education not marketing. I want you to be informed and ultimately self-sufficient – it is Becoming Your Own Banker. I’ll give all the help you need but I’m not going to be your banker for you.

Would I do anything differently? No, I don’t think so. Because now I feel I can better relate to those caught in the noise. I feel like I can better answer if someone asks me why I recommend one company over another, one product over another.

So, what were my lessons learned? That will be my next post.

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